Can I Talk to God Like a Friend?
Mar 23, 2026Summary
Do you ever feel like your prayers are just a script you have to follow? You use the right words and the right posture, but deep down, you feel like you're talking to a distant King rather than a loving Father. In this episode of the Arise, Women of God podcast, host Tamara K. Anderson joins licensed clinical social worker Wendi Christensen to answer the profound question: Can you talk to God like a friend?
We move from presenting a "perfect" version of ourselves to being entirely authentic with the One who knows us best. Wendi shares expert advice on how to stop spiritual censoring, breaking down why God can handle your anger, fear, and frustration just as well as your praise. We discuss the trap of projecting our earthly fathers' flaws onto God, and how to turn your car into a sanctuary for raw, honest conversations. Whether you're a Christian woman looking to overcome the pain of spiritual perfectionism or simply curious about can you talk to God like a friend, this episode is packed with valuable takeaways. Plus, we explore the story of Mary and Martha to show why simply "being" with Jesus is sometimes more important than "doing" for Him. Tune in for a thought-provoking discussion on can you talk to God like a friend, and don’t forget to subscribe for more expert insights on building your relationship with Christ!
Episode Takeaways
- The Evolution of Faith: It is a natural spiritual evolution to move from being a "servant" to being a "friend" of God. Jesus explicitly stated this in John 15:15: "I no longer call you servants... Instead I have called you friends."
- Taking the Mask Off: God already knows your heart, so trying to present a "perfect," rule-following version of yourself in prayer is only deceiving yourself. God wants your honesty—including your anger and frustration.
- The Car Sanctuary: You don't always have to be kneeling in a quiet room to pray. Wendi shares how some of her deepest, most authentic conversations with God happen while driving in her car, treating Him like a best friend in the passenger seat.
- Mary vs. Martha: Martha was busy doing things for Jesus, but Mary chose the "good part" by simply being with Him. Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is stop your busy work and just sit at His feet.
Resources
Are you ready to move from formal acquaintance into a deep, personal relationship with the Savior? Download our FREE Roadmap to Revelation: 6 Steps to Hearing God in Your Daily Life, which includes an exclusive Receiving Light and Revelation Audio Meditation to help you sit at His feet today! 👉 Download the Bundle Here: https://www.womenwarriorsoflight.com/pl/2148756546
Reflection Questions
- When you pray, do you feel like you have to put on a "game face" and hide your true emotions from God?
- Have you unknowingly projected the traits (good or bad) of your earthly father onto your Heavenly Father? How are they different?
- Where is your "Car Sanctuary"? Where can you go today to just talk out loud to God without censoring yourself?
- Are you currently in a "Martha" season (busy doing) or a "Mary" season (quietly being)? How can you choose the "good part" today?
Host & Guest
Tamara K. Anderson @tamarakanderson
Wendi Christensen @wendichristensencounseling
Transcript
Tamara K. Anderson
00:00:00.560 - 00:03:05.950
Do you ever feel like your prayers are a script that you have to follow? You use the right words and the right posture, but deep down you feel like you're talking to a distant king rather than a loving father.
You're asking, can I talk to God like a friend? Because you're craving a deeper connection, but you're afraid that might be too real or perhaps irreverent.
By the end of today's episode, my friends, you will understand the natural evolution of a spiritual relationship moving from servant to friend.
We're going to help you solve the pain of spiritual censoring by sharing how to take that mask off during your prayers, how to turn your car into a sanctuary, and why God can handle your anger just as well as your praise. We're moving from presenting a perfect version of yourself to being the truest version of yourself with the one who knows you best. Stay tuned.
Ordinary Women Extraordinary Faith When God calls, we say yes. The Arise Women of God Podcast hello, and welcome to another episode of the Arise Women of God podcast.
I'm your host, Tamara K. Andersen, and joining me today is Wendy Christensen, my co founder of Women warriors of Light. She's also an amazing Christian counselor and licensed social worker.
And today we're talking all about the beautiful transition into a friendship with God. Can I talk to God like a friend? And I really, really like this question. I think this is the natural evolution of things.
Just like any friendship, you know when you first start hanging out with a person, you're like, oh yeah, they're nice. You know, they're more of an acquaint.
And as you get to know them better and you start sharing maybe a little more of your heart and they do the same, then it becomes a friendship. And I think the same can be said of our relationship with God.
If you're feeling like I need to talk to God more like a friend, it's because you're craving that deeper intimacy with God. And that's the natural evolution of it. So the answer is absolutely 100% yes. In fact, that's where he wants your relationship to go, is to friendship.
I love the verse found in John, chapter 15, verse 15, where Jesus is speaking to his disciples and he says, I no longer call you servants. Instead I have called you friends.
So you can see they've evolved from being just servants and hanging out with him and following him for so long, several years now. They're now his friends. He wants us to be his friends. Isn't that awesome to know?
Now Wendy is going to dive into the Struggle many of us have, because we are looking at God through the lens of our earthly fathers. And sometimes that lens can be a little bit cracked.
Wendi Christensen
00:03:06.030 - 00:04:29.380
I've had a few people that I know that maybe struggle with that relationship with God, right? Because we tend to think, well, God's in charge. So, you know, why are these challenges in my life? Why are these struggles in my life?
But I think if you can step back and see that he has your best interest at heart and that he truly is that friend, I would challenge you to look at your relationship with your. Your father here, your dad. So sometimes our. Our dad here or our biological father here, we tend to project that relationship onto God.
And it's very different because God is different than any earthly father is. And maybe you had a great father, right? And so it's easy to see him, you know, and see heavenly father being that way.
But what if I had an abusive father or a father that was very detached? It would be a little challenging for me to have a good relationship with God.
But you can still create and have that good relationship, like you were saying, Tamara, to spend time with Him.
And I think as you spend time with him and in the scriptures, you can develop or have that beautiful relationship with him to where you can call him your friend. Because unlike us imperfect people, he is perfect.
And that means he's perfect in love and compassion and perfect in understanding and perfect in all things to where we can have a relationship with Him.
Tamara K. Anderson
00:04:29.860 - 00:06:04.220
It's about being real, authentic. I'm past the point of censoring what I say to him because I know he knows my thoughts anyway. I want my kids to see that too.
When they leave home, the best thing I can leave them with isn't a list of rules, but a friendship with God whom they can lean on. I can tell him anything and everything.
And I want my kids to develop that same relationship with him because I can't be with them the whole time, but he can. And he can walk with them through every emotion of life, every circumstance of life, whether good or bad.
Just like I've learned to walk with them through every circumstance, good or bad. It's hard to send your kids out there and be like, okay, good luck, you know, dear God, please watch over them.
You know, but at the same time, how else are they going to develop that relationship with God if they're not placed in a situation where they can't always contact you and lean on you and depend on you, who can they depend on? I'm thankful that I've been Able to develop that kind of relationship with Him. It's not something that, you know, 1, 2, 3, your besties.
It takes that time and learning to talk to him that way and feeling confident that he is hearing you, even when you're like, I don't know if my prayer is going past the ceiling. So it's a process. It is a process toward becoming authentic with God, isn't it? Next, Wendy's going to share a quote that perfectly describes this.
Wendi Christensen
00:06:04.460 - 00:08:18.300
There's a quote from Teresa of Avilla. Mental prayer, in my opinion, is nothing else than an intimate sharing between friends. And I remember when I was a teenager, I was very careful.
- I felt like I had to be perfect. And so I always had, like, this game face on, like, you know, where I would present this perfect person to everyone else.
But of course, behind the mask, there were all kinds of feelings and emotions going on. And I think in my prayers I did that too. Like, I would present. I felt like I needed to present this perfect person to God.
Like, I'm doing everything you're asking me. I'm trying to, like, live up to everything and be enough for you, God, so that you'll love me.
And that was the wrong way to approach God, because He knows me already. He already knows me better than I know myself.
And I knew that in my head, but it wasn't registering where I'm like, well, of course he knows who I am. He knows my heart, my desires. And so once I figured that out, then I started going, why am I not being honest with God?
It's myself I'm deceiving, not Him. So then I was able to open up and be completely honest with Him. This is what I'm feeling.
This is my anger, here's my fears, here's my frustrations, and really talk to him as you would a best friend. It took my relationship with him to a whole nother level to where now my favorite place to talk with God is actually in the car.
I have a minute to breathe. I'm driving along, and if there's something just heavy on my heart, I. I just might turn the radio down, turn everything off.
And I'm like, okay, God, let's have a conversation. I like to call him Heavenly Father, Like, Heavenly Father. Here's where I'm at. This is what's going on. This is what's upon my heart. What do I do?
And I almost feel sometimes those are my best conversations. Still, it's important, I think, to get on your knees and pray and have that pondering and quiet time as well, when I'm not driving and distracted.
But sometimes those are. Those are my best conversations with him. Just in the going and the doing. That's how we develop a relationship with someone. We spend time with them.
And if I don't spend time with him, then I can't develop that relationship. So I do need to take moments in the day to spend time with him.
Tamara K. Anderson
00:08:18.620 - 00:08:34.360
The truest, most authentic version of yourself is the one God wants to talk to. We see this in the story of Mary and Martha. One was busy doing and the other was simply being a friend. And both can be good at different times. Right.
Wendi Christensen
00:08:34.600 - 00:10:07.690
It makes me reflect on the story of Mary and Martha.
Sometimes I wonder if it was a little more symbolic because I think Martha wanted to learn, you know, so this, the story I'm referring to is Martha is busy preparing things, getting dinner ready, you know, hustling.
Christ has come to visit them, and Mary comes and sits at the Savior's feet, and she's just spending time listening to him and his stories and the teachings and things he's sharing. And Martha's like, come on, Lord, how come you need to tell her to come and help me? She needs to be busy and come and help me.
And he basically, just what she's doing is good, Martha. It's good for her to sit at my feet and listen. And I wonder sometimes if what he's pointing out in that story or sharing that story is the.
Sometimes when we get so busy, we're just going and doing so much that we just forget to stop and have those conversations with him and listen to him and hear him and talk with him.
And that's the Mary times in our lives versus the Martha times in our lives where we aren't listening and we're busy and we're lots on our plate and lots that we're doing. And I just don't have time for him right now. You know, how many Martha vs. Mary moments do we have in our life right now?
Where are you in your life in stopping and listening and spending time with him to be able to get to know him and hear his teachings and his stories and know what you need to do because you're spending that time with him versus the busy work.
Tamara K. Anderson
00:10:07.930 - 00:11:50.970
Yeah. I believe Jesus tells Martha that, you know, she's busy about lots of things.
But Mary has chosen this good part, and I think that's a good way of probably wrapping this up is choose the good part. Choose being a friend to Jesus. Involve him in your life. Say those prayers in the car.
If you're needing to process something or need help with something, it's good. So strengthen that friendship when you can, and it blesses all other areas of your life. You don't have to be perfect to be a friend to God.
You just have to be present. Whether you're pouring your heart out in a grocery store aisle or having a raw conversation in your car, BE is listening.
He loves you, he cares, and he wants to develop that friendship with you. If you're ready to move from formal acquaintance into a deep personal relationship with the Savior, we want to help you start that conversation.
And we have two powerful gifts that we're going to share with you. The first is our Roadmap to Revelation that will give you six steps to help you hear God better in your daily life.
The second free download is our Receiving Light and Revelation audio meditation that you can download and use anytime you desire that deeper connection so that you can hear him and act more easily. The link is in the description below.
So my friends, go spend five minutes being a Mary today, sit at his feet and just be real with Jesus, your friend and until next time, may you arise. Do it God's way, God strong.
